Where the Saints Will Go

Reminiscing

2011-07-07T14:22:00.002+08:00

I didn't know I could write so well before. I checked my previous posts and my old entries from my other blogs and voila! it hit me that I could write so well. It's funny really because I used to think that my writings and rantings were simply horendous (in a bad way, really) but now, it gave me a second thought. I should write constantly and bring back that (should I say bad ass...) writing style.

Anyway, I'm writing again and loving it. I hope I could get pass a little insecurity though. :)

New Blog

2011-06-24T21:25:00.002+08:00

This will be my last post here. I'm simply using this as my avenue for improving my writing skill. I'll probably create a new blog but everyone who knows me will not know about it unless I tell them that it's mine.

Bye!

Re: Knowing What You Do Not Want

2011-06-23T16:56:00.003+08:00

I got a message saying that knowing what I do not want will make me realize what I want. It made me think actually about what I do want.

I already know what I don't want. Now what I do want is a matter to ponder about. I want so many things but I cannot do everything in one sitting. Probably not even in one lifetime. But I wanted to do all those things anyway.

IF you're wondering what they are, here's a rundown list:

1. Take a course in Anthropology.

Yes, I've always been interested in discovering anything that would reveal our past. I love to know our history, how we came to be, or if what I've been reading in history and science books really took place and is taking place. Are we a product of an all powerful being or are we just a product of something that has evolved? If the subject could really reveal and evidence of our evolution that would be quite cool right? It's just a matter of interest though. I still believe that an all powerful being created us.

2. Study Piano.

When I was younger than I am now. I used to play the synthesizer. But what I really wanted to learn is play the piano. Yes, the real one. The one where you use to move all your finger together and do not simply use your left hand moving three or four fingers to form a chord.

I want to create beautiful sounds. The one that will make hearts flutter, calm one's senses, or simply make one sway to its rhythm. I wanted to have that sense of oneness with the universe using music. My hands are getting clumsier and a little heavy. I hope It's not too late for me to learn.

3. Learn different languages.

Yes, I love learning different languages. I know French but I'm kinda rusty. I studied it a long time ago and my teacher said I should continue it because I speak fluidly (ahem...).

Anyway, I need to go home. I will continue my my wishlist tomorrow. For now, Ciao World!

2011-06-22T08:55:00.002+08:00

I am angry at myself for being stupid most of the time. I can't make sound decisions. I try to study everything and see the best possible actions for all my plans but I end up making all the wrong moves... stupid, stupid, stupid!!!

2011-06-21T12:40:00.003+08:00

I always tell myself that I would start writing again. But I'm procrastinating. I really hate procrastinating. So... This is my resolve... I will not anymore procrastinate. I will write everyday no matter how stupid or mundane my thoughts will be! :)

Death of Secretary Reyes - A Big Mystery

2011-02-12T20:57:00.005+08:00

The death of Secretary Angelo Reyes, former AFP chief and one of former President Arroyo's staunchest allies, left a vacuum in the investigation on the corruption issue involving the highest leaders of the AFP and of the Philippines.

His death, which was declared as a suicide, is a big mystery to many. It was reported in several newspapers and television news that he received a call before he committed suicide at the site where his mother was buried. A witness who was also interviewed on the television said that he saw Reyes shot himself on the chest. The circumstances surrounding his death became more questionable to many because no autopsy was conducted to his body on the request of his family.

His friends and family thought that his act was an act of courage and an honorable thing because it was done for the love of his family and the AFP Institution. Several congressmen made a call to stop the investigation to spare his family because of what happened to him. However, others are also calling for the continuation of the investigation saying that his death should not be a barrier for discovering the truth.

His death may be a means to an end but the big question still remains - is he guilty or not guilty?

Timmy, timmy where are u?

2011-02-05T18:10:00.002+08:00

My son tim is already on his 4th month. he's kinda heavy hehe. i miss him. he's with my nanay and tatay now. he will return 1st week of march.

Doctor's Visit

2010-10-16T16:52:00.002+08:00

Today is Tim's first visit to the doctor. It wasn't that long. The doctor checked his heartbeat, weight, and any other problems that we have encountered before the check-up. He said everything's normal.

He will have his vaccine next saturday.

Quote of the Day

2010-10-14T19:16:00.001+08:00

Maybe the atheist cannot find God for the same reason a thief cannot find a policeman. ~Author Unknown

Realization

2010-10-13T20:48:00.002+08:00

It's really hard caring for your child when you don't have someone to help you.

When I get to ponder about it, I realized how hard it is for my parents to take care of us 4 kids especially my nanay. They don't have anyone to help them care for us. No house help, no kins, no other person... they had to endure everything on their own.

And I appreciate them more than before. I hope it's not too late to give back what they have given us.

1st Bath

2010-10-07T14:14:00.005+08:00

This is my first bath... it was mama who bathe me and not mommy. mommy just stood by to watch. she didn't know how to then. now she does :)

mommy took picture of half of my body. she said the other half is censored :)

Baby Routine

2010-10-04T14:07:00.002+08:00

Eat... poop-out... sleep... bathe... eat..... sleep again...

1 am-5 am... wake up and make life hard for mommy and daddy!

Baby Tim :)

how this blog is supposed to be...

2010-10-03T16:32:00.004+08:00

at first, i wanted to create an art blog. but i decided not to. i just want a medium to express my thoughts.

here are some of my resolutions:

1. write one blog everyday

2. find a home-based writing job

3. jump start our business plans

4. take care of my baby tim

5. start saving for a new house

Directions... directions

2010-01-21T12:34:00.003+08:00

Im currently at the crossroads of my life. I can't seem to decide what direction I should go to. I'm about to graduate and take the bar but there are other things that I want to be doing (like studying photography - which is quite far from my chosen course, becoming a make-up artist)...

I also cannot seem to get out of my system the culture of appearances. I used to be indifferent to what people are thinking but now, that's all I can think about. I'm going crazy about many things.

I need peace of mind.

Heritage Month at the MET and other places...

2009-05-26T15:41:00.002+08:00

My friends and I went to the MET MUSEUM for the opening of the Alcuaz Art Exhibit. I will probably be posting the pictures next time.

There are other exhibits going on in different parts of the country. Here in Manila, besides the MET and National Museum, there's also one at Robinsons Place Manila. Check out the exhibit on Patis Tesoro's creations.

Ciao!

Changing my Blog's Theme

2009-03-19T10:25:00.000+08:00

I plan on making this blog an art blog. Watch out soon :)

10 things that I want to do before I die

2008-09-17T16:09:00.003+08:00

I was told once that if I can't think of anything to write, just write anything that goes into my mind. But how can I write about anything as well if nothing goes in it? Wonderful lol :)

_____________________

1. Travel the world using my own yacht.

2. Own a whole town.

3. Do Bunjee Jumping and Wind Surfing.

4. Go to the moon.

5. Plan a concert for the deaf.

6. See the Dalai Lama.

7. Talk to the richest man in the planet.

8. Become the richest man in the planet.

9. Exterminate all male species.

10. World Domination.

2008-07-24T22:26:00.003+08:00

I love this picture. This was taken from an old model cellphone :) It shows my flat nose. hahahhahahha :) and one of our sweet moments... :)

2008-07-24T09:44:00.003+08:00

This is my Ber :)

Interesting Finds

2008-06-24T01:51:00.003+08:00

I was just surfing around when I stumbled upon this: Why I Don't believe in God. It's a blog of an advocate of atheism. It's an interesting read regarding the reactions of people reacting to reactions of other people :))

I also stumbled upon this topic: The Logic of God in History. It's actually an answer to some comments from the first one.

--------------------------

It's 3 a.m. and i still can't sleep.

I feel that my head's gonna blow up. I want to sleep but I can't. I'm so restless. I cleaned and rearranged my room in hope that I will get tired and just fall asleep out of exhaustion. But it came out that i'm more awake than ever :))

wrong idea.

Mama Pets

2008-06-23T19:02:00.005+08:00

This is my cat Diana and her new kittens. She recently gave birth to the two on the right :) the one on the left is also her child, the only one who survived from her past birthings :) His name is momo and he really looks scary now coz of the scars and wounds on his face and ears. I would like to post his pictures but had some second thoughts. Probably next time, when he is all well and looks handsome.

This is another pet of mine, Bondying :) I didn't name her. It was an uncle who used to abuse his pets. We adopted her about 4 years ago because my uncle didn't want her anymore. When she came to use, she just gave birth to 4 litters. However, on their way to our house, her four babies died because they suffocated. My Uncle placed them at the back of the car...

It's her look when she saw the kittens. She also got teary-eyed. Do you think she remembered her babies?

Eons Ago...

2008-06-21T13:55:00.003+08:00

i had this blog...

now, i have it again!! yehiii!!

I thought i already lost this one. The last post here was two years ago mind you, hahahhahah.... anyway, i thought of finding old stuff here in my treasure chest, heheheheh... all i found was crap :)

anyway, i'm going to write again. I'm going to write something sensible, i think :)

Reality Bites

2006-07-19T16:39:00.000+08:00

Here I am, dragging my feet at 7 am to take a bath and be at the office at 8 am to do nothing but blog. At 12 noon, we take D'lunch and watch our favorite afternoon show "Eat BulaGa". After eating, I sleep at 2 pm 'til 3 pm. After waking up, I check my email and blog. What a life. DOLCE VITA!

________________

Mi Vita Y Amore is without reservation. I'm born to be wild yet, somehow, I'm fettered with this sense of duty. To what extent, I don't know. I just have to be on guard not to let this free-spirit get tied down. Or maybe...I already am...?

_________________

School's dragging me down. Damn, I see my life hanging in a balance. I see ME already falling-off...

I need a digital camera

2006-05-24T14:50:00.000+08:00

My dad said he'll send me one but.... obviously, my wish didn't come true. so if anyone's interested to give me one, i will be your slave for life (no, not really) .

here's my address:
Bluemist
428A P. Ortega Street, Tondo, Manila 1012 Philippines

Hahahaahah... yeah, I'm THAT desperate... please, please, please, anyone?

Conversations with God #2

2006-04-10T15:05:00.000+08:00

Ok, i just heard of the book and I borrowed it from a friend. Call me stupid but I must admit... that's what I am sometimes. Anyway, I realized now I'm not the only one who talks to you often in this manner when I read the book. And I wanted these words to materialize. I don't want them to remain in my head. Why? Probably because I want to know what I'm bubbling or raving or ranting about. I want to remember so that I know what are the things I'll have to change within and about me. Yeah, I'm crazy... or getting to that state. But it gives me hope to believe that you're there and my life has a purpose. I just wish I can live up to that purpose.

Conversations with God #1

2006-04-07T11:33:00.000+08:00

God since I cannot feel your presence right now, I will try to find a way to experience you. Yes, i will be persistent. I will try to find you in everything that surrounds me - in every works that I will finish, in every words that I will say, in every acts that I will do - in everything that I am and everything that I will ever be.

Katawan, Pangangatawan, Pangatawanan: A Passion Show for Women

2006-03-10T15:44:00.000+08:00

Long title isn't it? Anyway, it's the title of our fashion show held at NCCA Building in Intramuros in celebration of the Women's Month.

__________________

I love this pix.

We are celebrating independence. We are celebrating our liberation from suppression of self-expression. We are celebrating womanhood.

Powered By Qumana

A coup or just paranoia working?

2006-02-28T14:40:00.000+08:00

February 25 is supposedly the date of the annual celebration of People Power Revolution but a day before that, a news came out about a coup attempt against the Arroyo Administration. A few hours later, a state of emergency was declared and some high ranking officials of the land were "invited" by PNP officers to answer some questions regarding security issues. A coup attempt??? How I wish it did materialize...

_______________________

For the past few years, the Arroyo Administration had been beset by destabilization craps. Oh yes, I see many politicians speaking against her. Shouting on the streets. Marching towards nowhere. But what happened after? Nada...

________________________

The only time I saw such real action was when the Magdalo group brought their grievances to the public eye. I salute them for trying to fight corruption in the AFP. Sad to say, the Government didn't listen to them.

________________________

What's with power that she can't let it go. hey, she won't be able to bring it to heaven... or to hell, anyway.

________________________

"Unconstitutional" she shouted. Resistance to the power that placed you in that position in the first place, what an irony...

Landslide in Southern Leyte

2006-02-20T21:17:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday, our country has been left shaken by another catastrophe. Without any warning, a landslide occured burying one of the whole town of St. Bernard. That morning, text messages were received by some kins from the buried town asking for help.

The Initial report was only about 300 survived. Some of them were out of the town when the catastrophe happened. For a community of 3000 people, 90% of its population was wiped out of existence. Different rescue teams from different countries arrived here last Sunday to help with the rescue operations. Some of them brought gadgets and machines that will help determine if there were people who survived.

At about 7 pm today, we received news that the rescuers were hopeful to find living beings underneath all the rubble. They were able to detect knocks from the flagpole of a school. Though it's still raining quite hard, the rescue continues.

Please pray for my countrymen whose families were buried alive. We know some of them lives still.

I LOVE MY BER

2006-02-19T23:05:00.000+08:00

that's all...

New Look

2006-02-16T15:26:00.000+08:00

I changed the look of my blog. I find this quite cool. It fits the personality. wahahahahahhah!!!

Anyway, one of my officemates just moved to another division. It's quite sad because she's the life of our section. But then, we all have to move on and move forward. I know she's happy there now that she's free from the bondage of pressure and stagnation. I hope we, too, will find our own peace here in the four corners of this institution.

Metrobank Art & Design Excellence National Competition

2006-02-02T15:04:00.000+08:00

The Metrobank Foundation is holding an annual Metrobank Art & Design Excellence National Competition or MADE. MADE successfully awarded last year young painters such as Chriseo Sipat, Marnie Corpus, Parker Encisa, Randie Gutierrez, young sculptor Jan Leeroy New, sculptor Duddley Diaz for the Metrobank Foundation Prize for Achievement in Sculpture, interior designer Marybeth Ting, and architect Noel Tan.

The Competition is open to young painters and sculptors 18 to 35 years old,and to licensed architects and interior designers aged 25 to 45 years old who are on the lookout for opportunities to improve their craft and enhance their stature in the field. For further details, just go to the Metrobank Foundation site or call 898.8856 or 857.5918.

National Arts Month

2006-01-30T22:49:00.000+08:00

(courtesy of NCCA)

February of every year was declared by then President Corazon Aquino as National Arts Month (NAM) by virtue of Proclamation No. 683. Since then, the NAM has evolved from a simple celebration into a nationwide event.

The National Commission for Culture and the Arts together with various cultural agencies spearheads the nationwide celebration. Different activities are undertaken such as musical, drama and dance presentations, visual arts exhibits, literary competitions, and many other. Different culture and arts groups have been, since then, working with NCCA to achieve our vision of uniting the Filipino people through the arts.

The NAM's current theme is "Ani ng Sining (Celebrating the Bountiful Harvest in the Arts)". For further details and nationwide activities visit the NCCA Website.

Happy National Arts Month!

NO POST

2006-01-20T21:00:00.000+08:00

EXAM WEEK! darn...

Rich Dad, Poor Dad

2006-01-05T15:45:00.000+08:00

A friend of mine introduced the book to me. At first, I was having trouble understanding what this rich dad and poor dad means but as the tale progresses, certain facts became clear to me on how to get out of the "rat race" and become financially independent.

The story began from the author's childhood on wanting to learn how to make money. The rich dad did not only taught them how to make money, but how to make money work for them. Likewise, part of the book says that the rich become richer because they accumulate assests rather than liabilities. The author even considered the home (would you believe?) as a liability. Not that the author is saying that we don't need one, we all do. But when you read the book, you will find out why.

Anyway, it's a good book I would recommend reading. A road to financial stability awaits everyone so better start now.

Houshin Engi

2005-12-27T10:11:00.000+08:00

The story was based from the Chinese novel Houshin Engi which was translated to Japanese by Ano Tsutomo. The Ryu Fujisaki created the manga and gave life to about 300+ characters.

The story started with Taikoubou being ordered by the head master of Kongrung Mountain to "houshin" 365 Youkai Sennin in order to purge the world of evil and for man to reign in peace. His main enemy was Dakki, an evil spirit temptress who placed a spell under the Yin Emperor Chuouu and made slaves out of the humans to answer for her whims. A great war has started not only among the humans (as they revolted against the Emperor) but also among the Doushis and Youkais alike. You won't be able to guess who will live or who will die so be prepared for a great pain as your favorite characters get houshined.

As you go deeply into the story a much greater motive will be revealed. The complexity of the story will be revealed only at the latter part. But the overwhelming characters will leave you reeling for more. No romantic angles (which is quite surprising for one) and full of action, suspense, and drama. It's like history, fantasy, and sc-fi combined.

Well anyway, try reading the whole thing and you will understand what I'm talking about. I'm still at Chapter 160. There are about 201 chapters for the whole story. Enjoy reading!

My New Year's Blog Resolution

2005-12-27T09:46:00.000+08:00

I would only be posting things that interest me and nothing else. I would create a new blog for personal agendas. And I will write twice or thrice a week. That's probably it. :)

Happy New Year everyone!!!

I'm Resigned

2005-12-26T19:45:00.000+08:00

And so this is Christmas, and i'm almost broke. hahahhahahhah. I got so mad with my mom awhile ago. She asks for money all the time and gets angry if you don't give her... man, some pain in my head and heart... She and my bros didn't even say thank you for everything I gave them... tsk tsk tsk...

Or maybe I'm just expecting too much. Serves me right... It made me realize not to expect much from people you love because the disappointment's quite different... there's a tinge of pain involve. And I can't do anything about it except rant.

I'm resigned...

Powered By Qumana

Merry Christmas Everyone!!!

2005-12-25T09:42:00.000+08:00

Merry X-mas everyone. I love you all. Greet Jesus one big Happy Birthday!!!

--------

By the way, I love all the gifts that I received though they weren't on my wishlist. Thanks to everyone who remembered and to everyone who greeted. Merry Christmas to you all!!!

Powered By Qumana

Christmas Wishlist

2005-12-20T12:54:00.000+08:00

We were told to make a wishlist for our kriss kringle. Here's my list:

1. Fountain Pen
2. Asian Pants
3. Backpack or body bag
4. By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept by Paulo Coelho
5. Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
6. God Bless the Gargoyles by Dav Pilkey
7. Sandman 1,2,3....by Neil Gaiman
8. Coraline by Neil Gaiman
9. Gap Dream or Escada Sports (the blue one)
10. Synthesizer
11. Digicam
12. PDA Phone
13. Laptop
14. Palm T.V.
15 Trip to Thailand

I dont want any of these coming from my boyfriend (coz I know he reads my blog). I made a letter to God. I want these gifts coming from other people. HEHHEHEHEH!

Merry Christmas Everyone!!! Have a blessed New Year Too!!!

2005-12-13T15:38:00.000+08:00

Life's been quite crazy lately. So many things had been happening which really burns me out. I want to rest for awhile and think about my life. I want total silence to envelop me just this once. I need time to sort out my life. I need a break!

Powered By Qumana

Hikaru No Go

2005-12-06T15:09:00.000+08:00

I got addicted again into reading manga. Thanks to my ever supportive boyfriend for lending me his collections. :)

My latest addiction: Hikaru. It's a story about a ghost named Sai No Fujiwarano whose spirit cannot rest until he attains the "Hand of God" by playing Go and a boy named Shindo Hikaru whose ordinary life was turned upside-down when Sai appeared before him. Their journey together in the world of Go opened many twists and turns which will make you laugh and cry. There were also characters who made the story more interesting like the boy genious, Touya Akira. He considers himself the rival of Shindo not knowing that the games they played was not by him but by Sai. His father Touya Meiji, a title holder and considered by Sai as the one closest to the hand of God. Shindo's friends Waya, Akira, and many others whom you will love as you know them one by one throughout the story.

I am currently reading chapter 111 out of 189 chapters. I can't wait to finish them.Don't let this one good story pass your sight. It's worth all the effort.

Powered By Qumana

Soulmates

2005-12-04T08:46:00.000+08:00

I've read an article in Metro about soulmates. It was an article of Jaime T. Licauco. He gave 5 characteristics on how you will know that the person you are with is your soulmate.

1. Irresistible Force
It doesn't matter what age or political, religious, racial group each of that person belongs. If it's time for them to meet, no barrier could keep them apart.

2. Absolute certainty
The soul recognizes from its very depths. The mind or intellect may fight the recognition due to external factors but one way or another, it will surface.

3. Relationship is total
In some relationships, we hide behind a mask. We may relate to others as well on purely professional or mental basis. But with our soulmate, the relationship encompasses all aspects of our life, both physical and spiritual.

4. Absence of guilt
A very strong reaction towards the opposite sex create guilt feelings, but with our soulmate, it is the proper feeling no matter what the circumstances are.

5. Soul expanding
The soul is the companion of another soul in all its journey. It is spiritually uplifting and all levels of physical, spiritual, and mental aspect is satisfied. It leads one to God and helps one achieve spiritual awareness.

According to Jaime, there may be other characteristics of soulmate relationships but the above 5 should be present.

Anyway, if you want to read the whole article you can look for it at Metro, July 2005 issue. Happy reading!

I just Woke Up

2005-12-04T06:46:00.000+08:00

I had three dreams. First one was in school. There was this girl who was teaching me to read. And two of my officemates went away because they were quite embarrassed that someone was actually criticizing me in front of them.

The second one was a burial pyre. There were some people chanting. And there was a feast thereafter. There was this igloo-like hut. I went inside and took some grains and placed those grains with the cooked ones.

The third one was also a feast. There were lots of food on the table. I was merely picking the ones I was going to eat. Then some of my officemates arrived. They were talking and talking but I didn't understand what they were saying. I just kept on eating.

Weird...

__________

Don't feel a thing today except my body giving up to stress. My lowerback is hurting. My abdomen is burning. And my joints feel like jellies. I think I'm coming down with a flu.

Ghost

2005-12-03T06:55:00.000+08:00

A ghost friend asked me when do I get hurt. I was taken aback with the question and pondered about it. Yes, when do I get hurt? And I answered her...

I get hurt when the person I love most don't remember me. When he remembers other people and get to do even little things for them but he can't do the same for me. You see when people don't remember, I remind them. I am that vocal when it comes to remembering because it's the worse thing that could happen to a person - to be forgotten. That's why I get hurt so easily when people don't remember even just to say hi to the ones they love and yet remember other people whom they say they don't care about.

I also tire of reminding them. That's why I just keep quiet when I am being asked what's wrong with me. Maybe they know what I feel, but they don't know why. And I don't anymore bother to tell them because they would forget anyway.

I become like you, you know. I am a ghost waiting to be remembered.

So what about you, when do you get hurt? Or do ghost still get hurt? I asked her wonderingly.

Well that's why I became a ghost, for the very same thing and the very same reason. Someone I love didn't remember. I exchanged everything for him. I defied the world for him...

And then what happened next, Did you ever tell him?

Oh yes, I told him. I told him that I will never forget so he shouldn't forget too. He said he wont. I told him that I will wait for him by the cliff. I went there at the time we spoke about. And I was there waiting for hours and hours and hours until it felt like forever. The vast ocean was about me. It called me as I waited for him. It called me and mocked me. He will never come, it said. He has forgotten you just like the sky has forgotten me. You see the sky sends little rains and even storms. And my happiness overflows. It's a promise that we will be one, one day. But he never did. So come with me. And join me into this loneliness.

And I told her, I can't. I will wait for him. He has not forgotten me. He will keep his promise that he will not forget me. Oh, but what a mistake. what a mistake...

And yes, the hurt still lingers. That's why I am still a ghost. Because the hurt never did go away. Maybe when I learn to forgive...and when I learn to forget, I will be free. And you will see no more and you will here no more of me. But for now, I am fettered to stay here until that time. If ever that time comes.

O ghost I am deeply sorry for you.

Don't be. Maybe I am here for you to learn too. Or maybe I am here because of you. As you can't let go, I can't let go too. As your sadness and loneliness grows, so do I grow strong. Maybe I am your reflection. Don't you see, I am here when you are lonely. You see me when you are sad.
Maybe it's all up to you to free me. It's time for me to learn through you.

So I ask you, free me. Free yourself. Find your happiness not with other people but within you.

Yes, you are right. Maybe it's time for me to let go. I will... I will.

Child in me

2005-12-02T14:20:00.000+08:00

This is ber and me goofing around.

_________________

I miss being a kid with no worries to think about except how much "baon" will I have and that the teacher won't check my assignment. (Yes, I spent all night doing all of them that I end up doing nothing). I fell-in-love with life as I was growing.

Of course, there are bad memories but things don't seem too complicated then. You can shout without someone shouting back at you except your playmates. Now life is so much like love - full of mystery (remember the authograph thingy love is like a rosary.... hehehe). Giving you so much happines but at the same time taking so much. For as life so glorify you so shall he crucify you (Thanks Khalil!).

And so I reminisce about the innocence, the purity, the naivete of it all. Remembering something like that opens my heart to new wonders and enthusiasm about life. And yes, I will fall all over again. I will fall to the same old songs that once touched my heart. To the same old movies that once made me laugh and cry. The same old streets that helped me build my dreams and hopes. And the same old promise of a glorious day.

Oh, I love to go back once in a while to that same old place in my heart where I dream and live and love. Because I know, I know deep in me, I would never stop falling for life.

_________________

That's Ber and me. We love goofing around once in a while :)

Powered By Qumana

I need a shrink

2005-12-01T08:22:00.000+08:00

I'm trying to fight some demons in my head right now. But the battle is quite tedious. I think I'm losing it T_T

____________

Prayer is the last resort of people who know that their wish is quite impossible and yet, still hoping that it be granted. Well, I'm praying for something :D

____________

I have this two recurring dreams. The first one was that I'm running quite helplessly into a narrow path where a gigantic stone was rolling down and chasing me. When it was almost near, I woke up. The same thing with the second one. I was inside a church.. I was on top of the balcony and I fell. I wasn't opushed. I just fell. And I saw lighted candles on the ground where I was supposed to fall. I woke up before I hit the floor.

I don't know if it's psychological because I used to dream of them when I was young. A little creepy, I must say.

Powered By Qumana

Waiting Game

2005-11-21T14:18:00.000+08:00

I'm sitting here at the corner of an expensive cafe savoring every sip of mocha brew I ordered. I look forward to seeing you from among the faces passing to and fro. My phone rings and it's your voice I hear at the end of the line.

"Are you there?"

"yes, I'm still here...waiting for you."

"ok, i'll be there. will just fix somethings."

The anticipation is building. It is as much as exciting as that of actually seeing you. I relish every moment waiting for you. Hoping to see a glimpse of that smile which makes my heart melt and that simple touch which makes me soaring. And another ring...

"I'm held up a little bit, but i'll be there."

"ok, i'll still be here."

Waiting. Time runs so slow. The heavens is getting dark. The air is getting cold. The night is young. I am still here waiting, anticipating, anxious to be with you. But time is running, and running, and running... without you.

Yes I will wait but I don't know know how much time is left for me to keep waiting... and waiting for nothing.

Powered By Qumana

A Tribute to Women

2005-11-18T13:04:00.000+08:00

Men should read this :D

______________

Why are you crying, a young boy asked his Mom? "Because I'm a woman," she told him.
"I don't understand," he said. His Mom just hugged him and said, "And you never will, but that's O.K.". Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does Mom seem to cry for no reason?". "All women cry for no reason," was all his Dad could say. The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry. Finally he put in a call to God and when God got back to him, he asked "God, why do women cry so easily?"

GOD answered. "When I made woman, I decided she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet, made her arms gentle enough to give comfort! I gave her the inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times will come even from her own children. I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going and take care of her family and friends, even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without complaining. I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances even when her child has hurt her badly. She has the very special power to make a child's boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears. I gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults and I fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly. For all of this hard work, I also gave her a tear to shed. It is hers to use whenever needed and it is her only weakness. When you see her cry, tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good. She is special!

Powered By Qumana

Protopage

2005-11-16T10:33:00.000+08:00

My boyfriend introduced me to this cool new site named protopage. You can customize it. You can place pictures, sticky notes, links in this single page. It's quite useful if you're a web person. Check it out and try :)

Powered By Qumana

Busy, busy, busy me :D

2005-11-15T16:24:00.000+08:00

yup. recitation's starting :) On Sunday, 20 articles and tons of cases for my bus. org. and property.

_______________

My sister and her family arrived last Sunday from Australia. We immdiately went to the hospital for Kuya Odie's mom. She seems quite okay now except for a little bloatings I saw on her hands. I hope she gets well soon.

My nephews are so cute. I'll post their pictures soon :D

_______________

I go out of the house 7 days a week. Five day in the office and 2 days in school. I'm broke. A friend calls me whenever she and her boyfriend fights. I have tons of reports to finish. I have a lot of readings to do. When will these torments end.

Some dreams... some people...

2005-11-11T14:48:00.000+08:00

I was having a wonderful dream. I was lying on a bed and the wind was blowing quite hard. I felt so cold. Suddenly, somebody embraced me. When I looked at that person's face, I saw Ber. I felt so comforted and loved. But all good things must come to an end and at the most inopportune time.

At 3 am in the morning, at the peak of my most relaxing slumber, the phone rang. It was a friend crying her heart out because she and her boyfriend had an argument. And he wants me to talk to him. Can you imagine what I would have said at him if I did? I didn’t talk to him because it’s their argument and relationship to fix. But I told the stupid girl to leave him. And not to disturb me at the middle of the night over some arguments that I don’t have anything to do about.

We just talked awhile ago and she was still crying. I don’t really understand why she can’t leave him when it seems that they don’t really love each other. They don’t even respect each other. She said that she felt she had this moral obligation to change the person but up to what extent? Up to the extent that she would be reduced into an inutile individual without dignity nor self-respect? I really don’t understand.

Though Love is intoxicating, it should be constructive. It should help uplift and strengthen you as an individual. I just hope those two will find it in their hearts to find it out before it’s too late.

Conversation

2005-11-10T15:40:00.000+08:00

“I’ll never love again…”
“just words… you’ll never stop falling.”

_______________

The world has given and it has taken more and more from me. So i’d like to live and let myself be and remove these lingering thoughts in my head – to run as freely and breathe the worries confining and fettering me. I’d like to cast-off every shadows enfolding my sanity - and get a glimpse of love and of life and simply of eternity.

So if you see me wandering off to a far and distant land, know that my journey is just starting. Don’t turn away but stay for awhile and I will tell you of accountings from a far away place in a far away time when the world is just remembering – how innocent, how pure and sweet everything can be.

Tell this seeker, this wanderer because I’m all the more yearning to find a home for this lonely soul, a home I can find solace. The world has given but it has taken more and more from me.

_________________

“home, I’ll never find home…”
“where your heart is… it is home.”

The Coin

2005-11-10T08:26:00.000+08:00

An unemployed graduate woke up one morning and checked his pocket. All he had left was $100. He decided to use it to buy food and then wait for death as he was too proud to go begging. He was frustrated as he could find no job, nobody was ready to help him.

He bought food and as he sat down to eat, an old man and two little children came along and asked him to help them with food as they had not eaten for almost a week. He looked at them. They were so lean that he could see their bones coming out. Their eyes had gone into the socket.

With the last bit of compassion he had, he gave them the food. The old man and children prayed for him that will bless and prosper him andthen gave him a very old coin. The young graduate said to them "you need the prayer more than I do".

With no money, no job, no food, the young graduate went under the bridge to rest and wait for death. As he was about to sleep, he saw an old newspaper on the floor. He picked it up, and suddenly he saw an advertisement for people with old coins to come to a certain address. He decided to go there with the old coin the old man gave him.

On getting to the place, he gave the proprietor the coin. Alas, the proprietor screamed, brought out a big book and showed the young graduate a photograph. this same old coin was worth $3M.

The young graduate was overjoyed as the proprietor gave him a bank draft for $3M within an hour. He collected the Bank Draft, went in search of the old man and little children. By the time he got to where he left them eating, they had gone. He inquired from the owner of the canteen who told him that they even left a note for him.

He quickly opened the note thinking it would lead him to find them . But alas, the words in the note reads thus: "You gave us your all and we have rewarded you back with the coin"

Signed God the Father, The Son and The Holy Ghost. 1 Kings 17:10-16; Matthew 11:28-30

Have you given your all to Jesus Christ? If you haven't, do so today and he will surprise you.

----------

I woke up with a heavy heart but I left all my worries and pains to God. When I got here in the Office and opened my e-mail, that's the message from God through a friend. Wonderful isn't it?

The 10 Things I love most about Life are...

2005-11-09T16:27:00.000+08:00

1. my Ber
2. my Family
3. Ber's Family
4. my 7 Cats
5. my 2 dalmatians and 1 "askal"
6. the air I breathe, the sights I see, the songs I hear, and all the love I get from my Ber
7. my work
8. sleeping everytime I get the chance
9. yummy chows like pasta and pizza and california maki!!!
10. my relationship with God

----------

Although I feel negative about so many things lately, I still love life and everything that it has to give. I love to look at the stars at night because I rarely see them especially since I live in an urban community and the sky, most of the time, is covered with smokes and fogs. It's really a blessing to see the stars peeking and smiling.

I love to sit in the park at night and observe the people around me. You will know them in the simple things they do. You will know a loving father when he carries his grieving child and sooths his hurts away. A caring mother who rushes to prevent her child from falling. Lovers who look into each others eyes as if they are the only people in the world. Yes, time stops when you look at all of them. And you will realize how lucky you are - how lucky I am - to experience life at its simpliest yet most profound awakening.

I simply love life no matter what or where or how.

And when life gets tough....

2005-11-08T16:14:00.000+08:00

1. I pray to God and leave all my problems for him to solve
2. I cry but never show it to anyone
3. I tell Ber
4. I stay in one corner and contemplate about life
5. I treat myself to the best dinner
6. I sleep it off
7. I play good music
8. I sing happy songs

-----------

Life's been tough quite lately. I'm trying to psych myself to stay calm, happy, and positive but I'm beginning to lose the battle. Something's eating me that I can't put my fingers into.

-----------

I thank Ber for everything that he has done for me. Yep... eventhough I'm quite difficult to be with at times, he puts up with me and my moods. And I think he knows me more than I know myself. I love, love, love, love the guy :D

New School..New Life..

2005-11-06T23:52:00.000+08:00

Yes judgment day was the worst day of my life. I now moved to another school. I hope life will get better. Anyway, maybe God has his reasons. But hey i love my new school. Some people are quite friendly and everybody knows everybody.

Judgment Day!

2005-10-27T10:50:00.000+08:00

2day is judgment day! I don't know what fate awiats this poor and hapless soul :(

3 Birthday Celebrations :D

2005-10-24T16:51:00.000+08:00

Yes I had 3 Birthday Celebrations. The first one was a surprise breakfast-birthday celebration given to me by my officemates. The second one was given to me by my father. And the third one, well, I spent for it - a thank you celebration for my friends and family. I will have a fourth one - a treat my boyfriend. He has been quite nice lately (heheheehhe...).

No, he's always nice, that's why I will give him a thank you treat :D

----------

SURPRISE!!! yep, i saw this one not-so-good, i got-up-from-the-wrong-side-of-the-bed morning. And it made my day. It's not everyday that I get surprises you see.

I didn't know why my officemates were not talking to me when I got into the office. All of them were quite reserved and giving me the cold shoulder when I gave them my most heartfelt "good morning!" (yes, i still have the guts to say that eventhough I went through a not-so-good, i got-up-from-the-wrong-side-of-the-bed morning). So I just decided to spend the day working and sulking. But a few minutes thereafter, I heard angels singing "happy birthday to you...". Yes, I almost cried (heeheheehe).

And All's Well that Ends Well

----------

This was at Max's. We had a family dinner. All of us (My dad, my mom, and 2 brothers) and some extended families (my cousins, aunts and uncles). It was fun. This is, I think, the second time that I celebrated my birthday with my dad here with us. He works abroad so he's not with us most of the time. This was his treat for me.

I thank him with all my heart. I'm deeply touched :)

My Birthday Celebration!!!

2005-10-23T07:55:00.000+08:00

Yesterday night, I celebrated my birthday with my family and extended ones. I'm quite happy because it's not everyday that we get to do this. But sad, on the otherhand, because my boyfriend wasn't able to come. He was scheduled to work on Sats and Suns. Anyway, we'll still go out next week.

----------

I'm studying all the works in business management. My family decided to go into business of wholesaling. I f anyone has tips, please let me know. It will be a big help.

October is Indigenous Peoples Month

2005-10-22T14:38:00.000+08:00

I just got from an event held at the Quezon City Memorial Circle. October was declared by UNESCO as Indigenous Peoples Month so we celebrate it every October of every year.

I will post some pictures of our indigenous peoples probably tomorrow. For now, I have to go coz I have a dinner date.

Ciao!

Judgement Day

2005-10-21T10:42:00.000+08:00

I will have my enrolment on Thursday. My biggest apprehension - failing and getting debarred. (ouch!!!)

Honestly, though I sometimes curse law school, I want to stay and finish my law degree. I don't really mind getting shouted at. I don't mind being called all the time for recitation eventhough my knees buckle so hard as if they will just fall off and out of my body. I don't mind getting cursed. I don't mind bad-mouth classmates. I don't mind everything as long as I will pass.

But bull... my heart's starting to pound quite hard as the judgment day goes near. My life flashes before me bit by bit. Everything's going crazy. Well, until the judgment day. I leave my fate in God's hands.

One more to go

2005-10-14T16:59:00.000+08:00

I will have my last exam on monday. I feel so depressed because I tried doing my best but it seems that it's not enough. I just hope and pray that I will pass.

----------

I love this template. It fits the name :)

----------

By the way these are my cats...

----------

you're only seeing five... there's more...

----------

No Post

2005-10-06T17:10:00.000+08:00

I won't be able to post something until next week. Exam's coming...

:( God help me ):

----------

By the why this is my dad's cat, Julien

Isn't he cute?

----------

i have tons of school readings to do. thanks to my ever reliable post its, highlighter and pens, and fuuuud for keeping me company. I can stay awake all night long :)

Just another day

2005-10-03T13:37:00.000+08:00

My computer with my working paper and foodamchis to keep me going...

I'm just updating some database for all our projects. I'm also doing some research on the artists' rights and benefits. Any links to a good source of materials concerning artists would be highly appreciated. Thank you :)

----------

Exam will start on the 10th of October. God I need to pass my criminal procedures. I don't know why I'm failing on this subject. I'm giving extra time for this one just so I would be able to pass. Is this because I don't have a criminal mind? (Just like to whine, no connection at all...)

----------

I love HP Photosmart 7260. It has this sockets where I can connect all my memory card gadgets (in different sizes, mind you!). I don't anymore need to get any cable or software to transfer files from my phone. I can also transfer games. Thank God for small wonders :)

----------

Our television doesn't work anymore. And it's only 2 years old. I can't anymore watch Encantadia and news (the only ones I do watch).

But I think it's a blessing because exam's quite near. Barely a week to go. Besides, everytime the t.v.'s on and I'm studying, I whine to my mom to turn it off because I get so distracted. Again, thank God for small wonders :)

School, school, school...

2005-09-30T10:34:00.000+08:00

School is about to end and we have barely 2 weeks to cover our recitation and discussions in criminal procedure. Though I don't really want to be called, I'm having qualms because it might become the basis of whether I will pass or fail.

----------

I'm selling pearls and it's going great. I'm trying to learn the ins and outs of the business. At the same time, I'm looking for schools and institutions where I can have a formal training on this craft. I'm also designing my own jewelries and accessories and so far, it's thriving.

----------

I have to finish school in 2 and a half years. If I extend, I will have to pay for my own. Sad, sad life.

----------

I will have a recitation tonight on Maceda Law - the whole provision. It comprises of 9 sections and I've still 3 provisios to go besides the 39 cases. Goodluck to me :(

----------

If I did not take my LOA and take the bar today, would I pass and become a lawyer considering my laxity in studying then? I don't think so...

My Ber...

2005-09-28T19:19:00.000+08:00

This is Ber...

------------

We met in law school 4 years ago. He was a snob then, never smiling at anyone except when the mood strikes him. But girls find him attractive. Maybe it's the mysterious aura surrounding him or simply the quiet elegance which he constantly exudes or probably the silent demeanor of an erudite man, but in any case, he's that attractive :D.

--------------

He was my classmate in law school. He became my friend because of a common friend. In law school, one really needs a support group in order to survive. Our "barkada" was our support group and that was the start of our life together.

--------------

How would I know that he was already courting me? It all started with the rain. It was mid-July afternoon while going to the faculty of civil law. I was walking without an umbrella, the droplets of rain hitting my denuded head. Suddenly, the rain assault stopped. When I looked up, a black canopy of an elastic fabric shielded my drenched head from the wrath of Chac. And he was there walking with me up to the gates of the civil law.

And the rest is history :D

---------------

This is ber and me.

And we're together eversince...

Bar Ops

2005-09-28T08:10:00.000+08:00

Last Sunday, September 25, was the finale of the most feared and much glamourized Bar Examinations. I had 40 brods and sisses who took the exam (and hopefully would make it).

----------------

I have no regrets leaving law school for a time because it made me realize the value of hardwork and humility especiallly in work.

----------------

Life outside of school is so different. School is just like staying at home while the war is raging outside.

Tam-awan Tawanan

2005-09-23T09:02:00.000+08:00

I had a peaceful sleep from 9 p.m. to 11 p.m. and afterwards, I studied from 11 p.m. to 2 a.m. for my recitation in criminal procedures and sales. I don't get much sleep during thursdays because my friday load is quite heavy (it's not really about the time... it's the subject).

----------------

for lack of anything to say: here is a pic from Tam-awan Village!

The beautiful morena lady from right is Glenn, she's a he. In the middle is the bungisngis girl, Gaydeen, and of course, me. By the way, Tam-awan is an artist village in Baguio. (I just want you to see our faces coz we look good in that pic :)

-------------

But really, it's a good place. It's on top of a mountain overlooking a vast expanse of hills and mountains. The village entrance consists of a small bamboo gate with a narrow passage going up to the the main area where the kubo cafe is. The pave is made of cobblestones of purplish-blue and deep brownish-red. There is a fertility hut for honeymooners which I forgot the name. There are airconditioned conference areas and rooms for bakasyonistas which are quite large and comfortable to stay in. There are artists who can make a portrait of you for a minimal fee (I posed for 30 mins without moving when I had my portrait drawn, and boy it's hard!). There are pictographs on the walls depicting the earlier symbols used by our native ancestors in communicating. Inside the cafe, besides the delicious Filipino dish they serve, there are paintings made by our very talented visual artists. There are also accessories, greeting cards, tambols (drums) with intricate designs, cds of traditional musics, books, shirts, etc which you can buy as souvenirs - all for minimal fees as well (from P20 to P500).

-------------

Anyway, that's the only pic I was able to upload because my connection is having some trouble. And Gaydeen thought of that title. I jus adopted it. Until Next time :D

It's all about Me

2005-09-22T14:37:00.000+08:00

I think I will just write about myself. No, I'm not self-absorb. Well, sometimes. But hey who isn't?

Anyway, this is me. I don't really know how to upload stuffs and make this blog look a little decent. Maybe in two to three months I will do better.

Going back to ME. For a start, I'm a law student. Yeah, I'm making a fool out of my self to think that I could still challenge time's eternal battle with justice (or is it the otherway around?). But hey, I'll still try my luck.

BTW, I'm not reading there. It's in a resto in Baguio. I was looking at the menu. One of my glorious days being a free woman. Now I'm weighed down by so many things - school recitations, injustices in work, despair seeing the poor (ows? hehehe... but true...).

Come October, I will know what lies ahead - if I will pass school or not. But let's just hope (yeah, I need shower of prayers and novenas) that time will be good to me.

I'm back

2005-09-22T11:30:00.000+08:00

Though I still don't have much time, I'm going to start writing again. Yes, you heard it right. I'm going to write again, though I don't have the talent for such. This is good practice for my soon-to-be profession. I'm going to become a LAWYER. Yup, right again. LAWYER. Sound's nice huh!

I'm going to study now. Until next blog :D

Back in Law School

2005-08-23T14:11:00.000+08:00

ok, i can't anymore manage so many things because i'm working at the same time studying. I even gave up my trip in Singapore and Malaysia for it :(

Until I get to have to to update....

Orisinal

2005-03-30T15:37:00.000+08:00

Here is a link to one of my favorite sites: http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/

This a game site, though they have sort of short movies. Anyway, the games were made using flash. All of them have amazing graphics. The game directory shows avatars to get into the games. These avatars look like watermarked paintings. Try it out :)

Isang tula

2005-03-28T22:01:00.000+08:00

Oo...
Ngayong gabi,
hahayaan kong
dumaloy
ang mga
luha.

Oo...
sa bawat patak
ay iwawaglit
sa sarili't
isipan
ang mga sumbat,
ang mga taksil na pangil,
ang matatalas na titig...
ang pag-ibig.

Oo...
dahil
ngayong
gabi
isisilang
ang
bagong
sarili.